Friday, January 29, 2010

"Solvitur Ambulando"

"It is solved by walking" says St. Augustine. After reading Sil's comment, I decided to repent! That is, literally, to rethink. My mind and heart were in a dueling match. There is only one thing to do when that happens. Go for a walk! I headed out to Buttermilk Falls, tuned in to the ethereal sounds of Libera on my MP3 player, and put one foot in front of the other. Why was I backtracking on my plans to walk the Camino? Because I wanted to be comfortable? Because I wanted it my way? This is supposed to be a pilgrimage, not a vacation, after all. There was a reason that the idea to walk the Camino seemed to fall into place this year. Am I losing faith in the idea of walking in faith? That my needs will be provided for in some way? As Sil said, what might I be missing out on that I will not have a chance to recapture for eleven years? Think of all the wonderful people I will miss meeting if I don't walk there this year. Perhaps I need to "celebrate" instead of "meditate" this year. I can always go back again for a quieter camino some other year.

As these thoughts trickled through my brain, a gentle sense of knowing came over me. Voy a caminar El Camino Frances esta primavera, despu├ęs de todo! (How's my Spanish, Tuula?) Just as my decision was made, a hawk took off from a barren tree branch above me and glided a few hundred yards down the trail.

3 comments:

  1. You have begun your Camino, really. I found that the Camino starts the minute I decide to do it. All these days and hours of walking before the Camino itself is already the Camino.
    So yes, second thoughts... But don't let them dissuade you from walking it. Yes, it will mean some sort of pain -- physical, psychological and spiritual. But the reward! Ah!

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  2. Claire is a wise woman! We share an interest in the spiritual writer, and self proclaimed Catholic-Buddhist, Thomas Merton, who said,

    “Sitting at home and meditating on the divine presence is not enough for our time. We must come to the end of a long journey and see that the stranger we meet there is no other than ourselves - which is the same as saying we find Christ in him."

    So, you go girl! Follow your dream (maybe you can take your daughter with you!!)
    Big pilgrim hugs,
    Sil

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  3. Thank you Claire and Sil! Thomas Merton, as you may well know, harks from an abbey a stone's throw from me, here in Kentucky. But few in this "neck of the woods" have the same understanding of the Christ. "May we all be One." Perhaps some day my daughter will go with me. But I will need to forge the path, I think. Onward! I hope and pray to meet you both someday.

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